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Building a Connected Relationship With Your Kids Requires Leaving Fear Behind | The Family Alchemists

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Updates on The Family Alchemists

Hi Friends, When I created The Family Alchemists in 2018, I had a really big vision and mission of connecting people to the resources they need to grow. I have so many amazing professionals in the Conscious Parenting space as friends and was determined to help them...

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In times of great social change, we look for the things we can control. We may not be able to predict the future for ourselves or our teens, but we can control how we communicate. The way we communicate reveals what we value and how we value it. I longed to connect...

How to Save a Marriage

So, you’re an empath married to a guy that treats you like a queen – most of the time. But those times he’s angry? You question if you’re more like your mother than you thought. You worry that his behavior is going to hurt your kids and that you’re being irresponsible...

WHAT DOES SPIRITUALITY MEAN TO YOU?

When I have a chance to actually discuss the topic with clients, it is very simple to explain my view of spirituality, understand my clients’ perspective, and come to a common ground semantically (and often philosophically). I notice I regularly attract people who...

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Dear Brave Ones: Of course, we’re scared. That means it’s the time to be gentle and compassionate with ourselves and others. Can you imagine how scared our kids are? Their routines have been disrupted and they miss their teachers and friends. They have less control...

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From the moment we are born, we are part of a race we never wanted to be in, we are measured by milestones and compared endlessly with any peers we share our life with. We are numbers in charts and checkmarks in lists of accomplishments, in other words, we are what we...

Mindful Parenting Through the Everyday Stresses

In the fast paced world of parenting where decisions are made in between spilled cereal, constant questioning and smartphone apps, it is no wonder the word mindfulness is becoming as necessary in a parent’s vocabulary as the word nap-time. And yet, for many,...

What our children ask of us

Our children ask so little really. Listen to my discoveries and ideas. Look through my eyes to understand my world. Feel my love, joy, frustration, pain. Hold my hand, my heart and me close. Be careful with me and understand me. I may feel off sometimes, when the...

Elf on the shelf, Magic of well-behaved kids?

I was already familiar with conscious parenting when the Elf on the Shelf became popular a few years ago, I found out about it when my kids were toddlers and I heard stories about him moving every night and being a fun addition during Christmas time. I was excited to...

Read more about Parent Coaching: Raising Children Consciously

I want to share my strongest, most unpopular belief:  “Corporal punishment on children (spanking, slapping, hitting with an object, making someone eat unpleasant substances) is violence (actions or words intended to hurt people).”

I remember as a little child being afraid of the people in my life I was supposed to trust to keep me safe from all harm, my family. I remember how preoccupied I lived trying to please my parents and being the perfect daughter, I was so busy trying to be the picture they had of me that I had no time to be myself, I was afraid to. I was intentionally harmed and threaten so I would learn life lessons and to make sure I turned into a good person.

Fear shaped me, of course I turned out OK, I was the product of my conditioning, a “good little girl”. got the degree, got the house, got the husband, got the good life, at least that’s what I thought until I got the kids.

The wounds from childhood resurfaced, I faced my greatest battle within. That little child that was never heard or seen was still there waiting to be healed. My pain shaped me into an “ugly” mother which makes my heart aches when I think of it.

Yes, I believed “I turned out ok” until I awakened

The beautiful journey of healing and evolving through motherhood is one that I am deeply grateful for, but a childhood lived in fear is still something that no child should have to go through. Because we remember and carry it with us all our lives until we face it again at some point in adulthood, usually after dealing with a lot of suffering and destroyed relationships.

If you are using corporal punishment as a way to discipline your children, I have been there, I see you. I know the pain very well. If you feel guilt and regret about the way you parent, it is time to listen to your heart, break the cycle and leave a new legacy.

I am here for you, to help you navigate a new way to build a connected relationship with your kids.

Isabel Stafford, Family Alchemist™

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Read more: Parenting Help: Finding Personalized Support is Easier Than You Think

#isabelstafford #nospanking #noshame #wedontturnoutok #wecarryourpain #noviolence #inthenameofdiscipline #consciousparenting #empathy #connection

 

 

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