NEW

Updates on The Family Alchemists

Hi Friends, When I created The Family Alchemists in 2018, I had a really big vision and mission of connecting people to the resources they need to grow. I have so many amazing professionals in the Conscious Parenting space as friends and was determined to help them...

How Recovery Principles Pave the Way to Conscious Parenting

Applying the 12 steps to my parenting helped me practice boundaries, communicate with integrity and ultimately BE loving and tolerant.

Conscious Communication Skills

In times of great social change, we look for the things we can control. We may not be able to predict the future for ourselves or our teens, but we can control how we communicate. The way we communicate reveals what we value and how we value it. I longed to connect...

How to Save a Marriage

So, you’re an empath married to a guy that treats you like a queen – most of the time. But those times he’s angry? You question if you’re more like your mother than you thought. You worry that his behavior is going to hurt your kids and that you’re being irresponsible...

WHAT DOES SPIRITUALITY MEAN TO YOU?

When I have a chance to actually discuss the topic with clients, it is very simple to explain my view of spirituality, understand my clients’ perspective, and come to a common ground semantically (and often philosophically). I notice I regularly attract people who...

Helping Your Kids During Coronavirus Social Distancing

Dear Brave Ones: Of course, we’re scared. That means it’s the time to be gentle and compassionate with ourselves and others. Can you imagine how scared our kids are? Their routines have been disrupted and they miss their teachers and friends. They have less control...

Out of the race

From the moment we are born, we are part of a race we never wanted to be in, we are measured by milestones and compared endlessly with any peers we share our life with. We are numbers in charts and checkmarks in lists of accomplishments, in other words, we are what we...

Mindful Parenting Through the Everyday Stresses

In the fast paced world of parenting where decisions are made in between spilled cereal, constant questioning and smartphone apps, it is no wonder the word mindfulness is becoming as necessary in a parent’s vocabulary as the word nap-time. And yet, for many,...

What our children ask of us

Our children ask so little really. Listen to my discoveries and ideas. Look through my eyes to understand my world. Feel my love, joy, frustration, pain. Hold my hand, my heart and me close. Be careful with me and understand me. I may feel off sometimes, when the...

Elf on the shelf, Magic of well-behaved kids?

I was already familiar with conscious parenting when the Elf on the Shelf became popular a few years ago, I found out about it when my kids were toddlers and I heard stories about him moving every night and being a fun addition during Christmas time. I was excited to...

As a homeschooling, work at home, mom of 3, I’ve learned that no matter how tempting it is to do big activities to create “quality time” true quality comes with connection, interaction and involvement.

When I ask parents about whether they feel guilty within their parenting experience, most will reply yes and often this surrounds the issue of how much actual time they spend with their children. They fall into the trap of over compensating, working extra hard to afford expensive trips, outings or treats. The pull for “quality time” often falls into “quantity time” as parents rustle any spare hour they can find and arrange some event with their children. It’s at the core of the supermom/dad epidemic, as we are convinced our children will be damaged for life if we aren’t forever in their eyeline.

I love spending time with my children. Living day-to-day with my family is the reason why we homeschool as well as why I work from home. We enjoy each other’s company in every moment and I’m always silently thrilled each time our children talk about how they will always live at home and that we will have to move close to any university they decide to attend. I love traveling with them, taking them to a movie or out to dinner.  However, what niggles me when I get too involved in one project isn’t the actual time I spend with my family, it’s the quality of it that I have to be consciously aware of.

I feel fulfilled, aligned with everything I am and want to be, when my son and I sit laughing together in his bed, really talking and connecting. I feel the same connection, each night, when my girls and I watch something on Netflix and give manicures. Those are the times that I feel present and focused. Those are the times when life sinks into a space of being lived.

We live in a time of smartphones, facebook, and multi-tasking. Our attention and focus is split in a million directions, scattered for thinking half-thought thoughts. But when our children get in the middle of that, that’s when they feel neglected. It really has nothing to do with outings and money spent on them.

Eye to eye contact, really hearing their dreams and desires, discussing their questions and listening to their opinions, with no difference than we would a friend, that is the quality time I relish in with my children, and yet that is often what I resist if I’m not careful. With to-do lists mounting, sometimes the true attention goes by so quickly and I try to do too much at once.

Now saying that there is another balancing act. It can be easy to fall into the guilt trap if that sort of attention isn’t constant as well. It’s not a question of listening to each long, drawn-out dream or story, only to be stressing about getting done what needs to be done. It’s also not the act of self-sacrifice so many parents can fall into, where our children’s stories are put above our own.

I love my world that I’ve created; my business, my clients, my membership program, my healings, my community.

But my children, who at between 10-17 have good ideas of who they are and how to play, have their own lives as well. They are busy in their own worlds. Sometimes, when I feel I’ve been working too hard, I go to “spend time” with them, only to find that I am intruding on their own focus, their own intention and I quietly go back to my world of wonder as well.

We are individual people, in each family, eager to enjoy the wonders and fruits of the world in front of us. It may feel like we are supposed to put life on hold for our children, but that is not the case. Our children want to see us in the fullness of ourselves, and being passionate about what we do and are. That’s what we want for our children as well. We have no wish to have shadows, having our children following us around waiting for our every word or wish.

It is in the ability of focus, the ability to listen with our hearts, eyes and ears, the inner knowing to drop everything because we are needed, the shared laugh over lunch, the smiles in passing, the connections a bedtime. Quality time, has, in fact, nothing to do with TIME, in quantified measurement, rather quality time means quality of life. A life that sparkles and dances when we and our children are in a room together, that is what creates a happy, stable childhood and home. – Christina Fletcher

FREE: How To Finally Get Your Child To Listen And Act By Understanding Their Development And Getting The Best Behavior Out Of Them… Even In The Hour Before Bedtime. Yes, Really.

Your Free Gift is on the way! Please check your inbox.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This